Why we do it

Parenting is hard. No matter how resourced you are, raising a child can be one of life's most challenging and rewarding experiences. But parenting can also be a great equalizer - regardless of income, race, or education, all parents face stress and challenges. And when that stress becomes chronic and toxic, it can have long-lasting effects on children's health and well-being.

But there is hope. By building supportive communities and practicing positive parenting techniques, we can help to buffer the effects of toxic stress on child development and reduce the effects of stress on the body for life.

What is toxic stress?

Toxic stress is defined as "the experience of prolonged activation of the stress response system in the absence of protective factors." This type of stress can be caused by a variety of factors, including abuse, neglect, and poverty. When a child experiences toxic stress, it can have negative impacts on their physical and mental health, including increased risk of chronic diseases, mental health disorders, and developmental delays.

How does community support help?

One of the key ways that community support can help to buffer the effects of toxic stress is by providing a network of resources and support for parents. When parents feel supported and connected to others, they are better able to manage stress and provide a nurturing environment for their children.

Studies have shown that social support can help to reduce the effects of stress on the body, including inflammation and immune system dysfunction. For example, a study published in the Journal of Health Psychology found that mothers who reported higher levels of social support had lower levels of inflammation, even after accounting for factors such as age, income, and education.

In addition, community support can help to address the social determinants of health that contribute to toxic stress. For example, by providing access to affordable housing, healthcare, and early childhood education, communities can help to reduce the stressors that contribute to toxic stress.

How do positive parenting practices help?

Supportive parenting practices can also help to buffer the effects of toxic stress on child development. These practices include things like responsive caregiving, positive reinforcement, and setting clear boundaries and expectations.

One of the key ways that positive parenting practices can help to reduce the effects of stress on the body is by promoting secure attachment between parent and child. When children feel securely attached to their parents, they are better able to regulate their emotions and respond to stress in a healthy way.

Studies have shown that supportive parenting practices can buffer the effects of toxic stress on child development and mental health outcomes. For example, a study published in the Journal of the American Medical Association found that supportive parenting practices can reduce the risk of behavioral problems and other negative outcomes associated with toxic stress.

In addition, positive parenting practices can help to build resilience in children. When children have a strong foundation of positive parenting, they are better able to navigate the stressors of life and bounce back from adversity.

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Parenting is hard, but by building supportive communities and practicing positive parenting techniques, we can help to buffer the effects of toxic stress on child development and reduce the effects of stress on the body for life. Social support can help to reduce the effects of stress on the body, while positive parenting practices can promote secure attachment and build resilience in children. By working together to support parents and families, we can help to promote healthy communities and positive developmental outcomes for children.

A peek into our groups

Recess’ new parent groups are held at the incredible Black Bird Bookstore and Cafe. It’s a beautiful space that is much more than a bookstore…It’s a community space, art gallery, and they even host weekly activities for families (most Saturdays).

We are a bookstore open to all. Our mission is to be a community space that brings people together through books, happenings, and an open door. Come in and hang out with us, climb in the treehouse, stay for storytime, or linger over a great new book in our backyard. Everyone is welcome here.

Recess is lucky enough to get to host our groups for newborns and infants in this oasis. Here’s a peek into our sweet groups:

Brain building activities for Newborns

Support your baby’s development from day one

A newborn’s or infant’s brain develops faster than at any other time in a child’s life.  Research shows that during this early period, back-and-forth interactions with caregivers, also known as “serve and return” interactions, strengthen neural connections in the brain. These connections are important for early learning and they establish pathways for future learning.  Relationships with nurturing and responsive caregivers are foundational for early learning and beyond.

Resources

• 5 Steps for Brain-Building Serve and Return
  This resource, by the Center on the Developing Child at Harvard University, details five steps for serve-and-return interactions with an overview video and downloadable PDFs in English and Spanish.

• InBrief: The Science of Early Childhood Development
  This brief from Harvard University’s Center on the Developing Child is part of a series that summarizes the Center’s essential scientific findings on human brain development.

• Baby Games Calendar
  Enter the baby’s date of birth on this website to find age-appropriate activities, milestones, and games or get them by email.

• “My 1st Year” and “Discovering Feelings” Books
  Download these PDF booklets to help better understand a baby’s development, recognize important milestones, and record experiences.

• Learning, Play, and Your Newborn
  This Nemours Foundation resource describes what newborns are learning and how caregivers can support them. Also available in Spanish.

• How to Play with Babies
  This article from Zero to Three offers fun ways to interact with newborns and describes common signals that indicate when they want to stop the interaction.

• Nurse-Family Partnership
  This national non-profit provides free support to first-time moms with regular nurse visits from pregnancy through the child’s second birthday to keep mom and baby healthy and safe.

Parents: An invitation to sit back and relax

Do less, observe more, enjoy most. - Magda Gerber

Children's brains are truly fascinating. They are constructing knowledge about their world from day one, and when given the opportunity to explore, they learn even more. It may seem counterintuitive, but allowing a child (yes, even a very young infant!) the space and freedom to play autonomously, and narrowing our role as parents to one of "observer" is a powerful shift. 

As simple as it sounds, taking a step back, and truly letting your child be can feel surprisingly difficult. If you're anything like me, you probably have an impulse to assist babies, to teach them "how" to use a toy, and to lead them through ways they can (should?) play.

You might hear yourself taking the lead and informing your child, "this block goes on top of this one," "Look at how neat this is," etc.  But when we intentionally stop and let them do the discovering it's pretty incredible what starts to happen!  

Observation helps us to understand what they are communicating, it allows us to realize the difference between our babies’ needs and our projections, to figure out what they’re really up to and know whether to intervene or stay out of their way.  It's nuts how often staying out of their way is actually an option! 

If you are interested in learning more, check out two of our favorite resources. 

Creating a “Yes Space”

Learn more about how to create a "Yes space" in your home for a child to safely explore.

A YES space is a gift to both children and their parents. It offers children ownership of a safe place that encourages play, learning, creativity, agency, and a strong sense of self. Parents get to enjoy one the great pleasures of parenting – observing their infant or toddler as they explore and master the world around them. Janet describes YES spaces in form and function, dispelling some common misconceptions and sharing tips about how children and parents can benefit the most. Learn more

Respectful Parenting

Gain a beautiful context for supporting infants development from one of the pioneers in the field Magda Gerber.  

The basis of Magda's Gerber's RIE philosophy is respect for, and trust in the baby to be an initiator, an explorer, and a self learner.

I LOVE her thoughts on toys and play. Do check them out here if you have an infant in your life. 

"One of the greatest gifts Magda bestows on us is the knowledge that infants are self-learners. And this is how a parent or caregiver spells relief. Self-learning means we don’t need to provide any lessons for a baby, and we need not feel pressured by developmental timetables. Infants are internally motivated to learn the things they need to learn: motor skills, communication, problem solving. 

We provide the foundation of a secure relationship with a caring adult, a safe environment conducive to exploration and discovery, and let nature takes its course. We never have to worry that we are not doing ‘enough,’ or that the child isn’t doing ‘enough.’ Whatever a healthy infant or toddler chooses to do in his safe environment is the perfect curriculum for him on any particular day. We let go of ‘doing’, and are left with observing, learning, enjoying."

-Janet Landsbury